off-set plans

Hello again,

Uhm...so today's been a mildly interesting one, I guess. I've got an audition tomorrow for a spot in the Ensemble show choir at my school, which has only 40 spots - 20 for guys, 20 for girls. It's a singing and dance audition, to an excerpt from the song "Since U Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson. I'm not overly-worried about the song itself, although I have to admit I'm pretty nervous...auditions in front of all the other people trying out in the auditorium scares me. But I'm trying to stay confident; I'm gonna try and work up the courage to do a mock audition during class tomorrow, so I can sort-of get my nerves gone. I really really wanna get in this year.; I feel like I've improved so much since last year...like I actually deserve to get in this time. And it would just make me feel like I've actually gotten somewhere with this singing/dancing thing, you know? I SO hope I'm good enough to make it in...

However, I've also just recently remembered that tomorrow is also the day I planned to candy flip (acid - mentioned in the previous entry). That and now my mom wants to talk to the parent of the friend whose house I'm going to end up at...I don't think that will be a problem, but you never know. And on top of that, to candy flip I need time - I've got to go home at 11 that night and if I don't get to start my trip until like 3 or 4, I might not be sober by that time. Considering my pupils already have dilation problems, that is completely not OK. So basically, I have no idea how this is all gonna work out. I've gotta make sure my eyes are normal by the 11; that's the main thing. I'll take Benedril to get to sleep - two outta knock me out if one doesn't. And besides, my show choir day-long "retreat" doesn't start until 2, so I've got some time to recuperate; it's just the length of the trip I have to worry about, or so it would seem. But then, I'm making sure I take a VERY low dosage...like, as low as it can be without it being pointless. So hopefully that'll make the trip shorter and less intense. I dunno.

Any advice would be appreciated. Like, on how to decrease pupil dilation, make trips shorter...that kind of thing.

Well, wish me luck!